so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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