I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
