It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Just invented taco cereal.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
