so that wasnt chicken after all
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
My bed is full of blood and feathers
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
