grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Randomize
