marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
