How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize