How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
