Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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