omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize