She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
