Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
