Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
