Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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