so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize