omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
