I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
It was like getting head from an anaconda
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
