your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
