nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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