Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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