Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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