ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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