the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize