Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize