They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
