just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
