Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
