I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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