Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
