Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
and she was petting her beer can
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
