none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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