am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
I intend to get homeless drunk
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
