I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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