belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
