On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
