Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
