i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
