How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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