At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
