Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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