So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
