Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
