but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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