Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Randomize
