dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
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