Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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