I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
This is my gift to your gina
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
