worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize