What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
