i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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